Schedules and grades and that sort of thing.

What is the day in the life of a medical student?

Well funny you should ask, because I’m still figuring it all out.
Specifically:
The way our schedule is organized is this…Gross Anatomy, Imaging and Embryology lecture in the mornings from 8-10am, followed by Anatomy lab from 10am-12 or later depending on the dissection, then there are often noon-time lectures or interest group meetings or something. Most of the afternoons we have free except for on Wednesday when we have a Principles of Medicine Course for 4 hours (a combination of lecture and discussion and mock clinical practice). Also part of this course is a preceptorship the hours of which are variable but generally equate to at least 3 or 4 hours a week.

Not so specific:
Growing up in an educational system where I never really had to study consistently, because the exam was deemed the end all measure of learning and intelligence, and I always did well on exams without having to study much……I’m trying to transition into a lifestyle of constant learning and intense study in order to master information that I can use to help people. Now why can’t I instead be disciplined enough to look over my notes everyday after class when I desire so much to do something useful for people and that is the direct result of learning this stuff, I have yet to figure out. However I’m getting better at buckling down. This is really hard though. And I feel guilty every time I reflect on what the result of my laziness could be. My conclusion is a lack of maturity on my part, which I’m definitely working through…Meanwhile, however, I am sort of embarrassed by my imperfection. Any encouragement that might motivate me or inform my understanding of the magnitude of this endeavor and thus motivate me will no doubt be useful in the future, my dear friends and family and random but kindly peoples on the internet.

Also interesting is that even though I’ve recognized the standard is learning for purposes of service to patients, I still suffer the pre-exam anxiety and the pre-results panic. This doctrine that grades are a reflection of self-worth is so ingrained even though it makes no sense. How can a single, instantaneous frame capture a person’s intelligence or gifts….(it’s as silly as claiming to know where an electron is exactly in an electron cloud).

How then will I measure my learning and progress? (suggestions accepted).

I know I need to be (1) striving for excellence and thereby (2) progressing, moving forward so that I (3) meet some of the needs of people around me.

But what specifically can I use to gauge my progress? (suggestions particularly accepted to answer this!)